


Around The Bend And Back Again

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, M/M, Masturbation, Nobody is Dead, Reincarnation, Time Loop, and loses jean a lot of times, but lets start off slow, hahah woops, i have never written for these characters so i am giving it a shot, jeanmarco, marco knows about the reincarnation thing before jean k, marco lives lots of lives, oh goodness, smut in later chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-22
Updated: 2013-11-21
Packaged: 2017-12-30 03:08:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I knew what this could've meant. I also wasn't stupid enough to believe that I had actually met this man before. But then again I have done some pretty stupid things.</p><p>Somewhere deep down I have awaken a keening and begging voice within. I have to figure out who the hell this bastard Marco was.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Know You I Swear, Please Don't Think I'm Creepy

I tended to snore, and quite a lot apparently. I would assume that my sleeping noises shouldn’t cause too much strife around the dorm room I shared with one other person but then again not everyone sleeps like a rock such as I. But it’s not like that the rough noises are entirely my fault. I mean nothing ever really is.

I would say that I am near flawless, the near being my snoring. My face is pretty much symmetrical and well shaped; despite Eren’s constant prodding that it I have the face of a horse. Though unfortunately for him horses are some god damn majestically pretty creatures so that little nut bag can shove it. Having a horse face honestly isn’t so bad- not that I am saying that I have one because I don’t.

A supposedly soft pillow hit my face with the force strong enough to make it feel as though it was filled with rocks. I shot up from my position on the dorm bed and quickly and whipped my head towards my roomie. Eren Fucking Jaeger was sitting there looking almost as pissed as Sasha when Connie ate all of her hoarded ramen. He emitted an aura of strong displeasure and I’m pretty much one hundred percent sure that it’s directed towards my snoring.

“Could you do me a favor and fucking pipe down Kirstchien, or so help my I will shove a cork down your throat to make you?” Eren practically spit this out at through clenched teeth. His jaw was pressed together so tight that I’m afraid that he’ll either run his teeth deeper in his gums or make them shatter inside of his mouth.

I squinted my eyes at him and hoped they are filled with enough malice and hatred before I opened my mouth, sucked in a deep breath and made a guttural, deep, and obnoxiously loud snoring noise. Eren released a roar of anger before crossing my minimal space between our beds and smacking me in the face with his way to hard Temperpedic pillow.

I thought that the standard issued dorm pillow hurt like hell but this was something else entirely. Temper-fucking-pedic has officially created the most comforting and painful tool of destruction. They are a company of evil and comfy beds. What ever they are doing to these fucking pillows needs to stop because I have never felt suck terrible and unimaginable pain in my life.

To be honest it felt as though Eren picked up a fucking boulder and carried over here and smacked my right in the face with it. One could say that he turned into a giant humanoid and picked up a fucking boulder and just slammed against my perfect face.

“What the actual FUCK Jaeger?!” Eren never replied he just grunted and smirked while walking back to his bed. In a last ditch attempt at defiance I made another loud snoring noise I have never seen anybody move so fast in my life as I ran and laughed the whole way to the bathroom while the little brat was chasing me. I ducked into the bathroom and locked the door to ensure my safety. I could feel the door jolt into my back accompanied by a loud thumping of Eren running into the door.

I couldn’t help but chuckle as I turned on the shower and stripped down. It’s been awhile since I’ve won anything against Eren and for once I did, even though I can feel my neck tense up and my face forming a bruise I think today might actually be half decent.

After rolling my neck around to loosen it I stepped into the shower and hissed finding that I seriously underestimated it temperature. I grabbed the knob with ninja-like reflexes and twisted it to the right making it cool down and become a more suitable temperature.

The water was nice and warm as it spread across my achy and tired body. Under the hissing fountain of water I have deduced that it was far too early to have done all of that running. I felt exhausted and it wasn’t even 6:30. I rolled my neck around trying to find the right angle in order to make it pop again. After feeling a small jolt in my neck I sighed in relief and hurried along.

Stepping out from the warmed and steamed bathroom and into the small living room attached was like a cold slap to the face. I keep forgetting that we were in the middle of fucking winter.

The tile floors were cold and unpleasant to be on, and I could swear that the dorm was so cold that the tips of my hair were starting to freeze.

Once I found myself in my room I hurried into a think shirt and hoodie while struggling to pull jeans on my wet legs. I ended up on my ass with my legs stretched out in front of me, the denim was started to soak and turn frigid and it appears that jeans were just not gonna work today.

I kicked off the stupid fucking pants and went to pull out a pair of pajama bottoms that had Lightning McQueen imprinted on to them. Before you jump to conclusions about my jammie choices just let me tell you that this is the softest and the warmest pair of pants that I own. I treasure them and their stupid car prints.

It was the first day of winter break and I can’t believe that I am balls deep in The Last of Us at 7:46 am. My original intentions was to be balls deep in The Last of Us at around 1:00 pm, but hey, when life hands you Eren Jaeger that wakes you up, you take it and run because if he’s waking you up it means that he is absolutely pissed.

My fingers works at the PS3 controller angrily trying to annihilate a horde of clickers with a single Molotov and what appears to be less than 3 bows left in my bow and arrow.  Though the angry button mashing got me next to no where when one had grabbed me and ripped my neck out effectively killing me and leaving Ellie alone, well that is until I start back to my save point.

After about a gazillion more attempts I went ahead and just gave up for now tossing the controller on the bed and got up. I pulled some sneakers on and grabbed the keys sitting on my bedside table.

 ‘I could really go for some coffee right now’ I thought to myself.

 They jingled ever so slightly when I twirled them around my finger as I walked out of the dorm giving a grunting noise and small wave to Eren, who was lazing about on the old couch. He grunted back and shoved a spoonful of generic brand Captain Crunch into his already full mouth.

 

I closed the dorm room behind me and smirked at the whiteboard placed on its wooden surface. It had a rough looking drawing from some student who obviously wasn’t pleased with Eren’s attitude as it depicted him with wide angry eyes and fire spewing from his mouth. While the picture next to it was a picture of me with a horse photo shopped onto my neck covering my face.

I turned away from our, if I do say so myself, infamous and excellently decorated whiteboard. I had my head down as I turned around so obviously I should’ve expected this but I ran head first into somebody’s chest.

I bounced back and I could feel the person I ran into do the same. I fell back on my ass for he second time today and groaned rubbing the back of my head.

“Oh, God, I’m so sorry I didn’t see you there.” I laughed lightly trying to get this apology over with as quickly as possible to save me embarrassment and time being wasted.

“Well, I would assume so since you did have your head down.” The stranger retorted sassily enough to make me whip my head up, scrunching my face into what I hoped was a nasty enough look to make them leave me alone.

But what I found when I looked up was not a face filled with disdain or rudeness, but a face that was soft and almost puppyish. His cheeks were littered with freckles, while some rebelled from norm and found their way onto his square jaw and perky nose.

I can feel my face warm up and my brain start to short circuit.

I can feel a strange sense of familiarity around him. I feel as though I have seen this face all of my life. These freckles seemed as though I have already memorized their location and the constellations that I can trace out. I wanted to reach out stroke the right side of his face. For some bizarre and weird reason I wanted to feel as though it was real. If it was really there, but I didn’t, because I didn’t want him to think I was a complete weirdo.

His stare started to drift from warm to slightly concerned as I continued to squint as his freckled face.

“Um, sir, are you alright-“his eyes widened and his hand flew to his face blushing and he continued with “is, is there something on my face”

I snapped out of it and shook my head and arms “no! No there isn’t I just- I don’t know, god I mean, fuck!” I couldn’t understand why my words were becoming so jumbled and hard to execute.

He stood up and offered a hand as I continued to rant and babble on, but my words faded out until I fell silent and grabbed his waiting hand and using it to hoist myself up. His hand was firm and soft and was slightly bigger than mine. I mulled over this fact in my head as he started to chuckle and snicker to himself. I looked up and him and was bout to question why when I looked down and found that I was till holding his warm hand, and was playing with his fingers and palm in my own hand.

I screeched loudly and released it as though it was made of fire. He heard the man turn his tiny chuckles into a full out mix between screaming and laughing. He was bent over with his hand on his knees and near tears. Once the shock started to wear off I began to chuckle a little bit myself until I was joining him with loud gasps for air that were once laughter.

He was the first to sit up and wipe the gathering tears away from his eyes and I soon joined him.

He smiled brightly at me and the corners of his eyes crinkled smooshing a few of the freckles there together.

He was the first to break the silence that comfortable but was almost anxious. “By chance do you know where the on campus coffee shop is?”  Jean thanked a god he barely believed in and spoke a little too eagerly with, “yeah man, I’m heading over there right now, and you can follow if you want to.” His freckles crinkled further and his smiled widened stretching his thin lips across his cheeks.

“I would really like that!” I can honestly not handle how cute this fucking man is.

“Well then quit standing there like an idiot.” This is bad very bad. My heart is lurching pleasantly in my chest and I am not very happy that it is. I don’t even know his fucking name.

‘Well actually that’s a very easy problem to fix you shithead.’ I snorted at my own thought and pivoted my head to look over my shoulder and asked “so, dude, what’s your name?” he looked at me with his deep brown eyes, and I swear if I ever have the opportunity to get lost in them I bet it would be like swimming in a fucking chocolate lake.

“It’s Marco, Marco Bodt.” My ears rang with that eerie sense of familiarity. I knew that name, but I couldn’t place it. And I don’t know why but I almost felt a little pain in my chest.

I was interrupted when he stopped alongside me and tilted his head a little to the right. “What about you? I’m sure there is something better to call you other than Horseface.” He smiled warmly despite the fresh dish of burning hot diss he just sent my way.

Oh god did I wanted to yell at him and hit him like I would do with Jaeger, but he was definitely no Jaeger. I scoffed and lightly punched him in his arm.

“Wow never expected Mr. Freckled Jesus to serve up a burn quite like that, it’s Jean Kirstchien.”

He winks at me and shoved his hands in his pockets, “Oh, I’m no angel, Jean, trust me.” I practically sputtered and coughed at Marco’s bold words and felt my face heat up near instantly. I stomped off quickly and shouted for him to follow me or I’ll leave him there.

The walk to the coffee shop was mostly quiet as Marco and I bumped shoulders and hands every once in a while. While I, as I hate to admit it, felt flustered and warm every time contact was made. God I’m such a girl.

Once we had arrived I opened the door for him and waved my arm towards the door and bowed, “M’lady.” He put his hands to his mouth and gave an exaggerated gasp as he sashayed through the door; he turned around intertwined his fingers and rested them on the side of his face. He spoke in an over done English accent, “Oh thank you Prince Jean of Dorm 32 Kingdom.”

I smirked and curtseyed. I broke character as well as he, and we started to laugh together.

I felt so comfortable around him. I could be myself and I could make shitty jokes and take all of the horseface jokes. It felt so natural to be by his side. His warmth and happy aura was welcomed and I almost yearned for it, and I’ve only known him for an hour.

‘Get yourself together Jean; don’t make him think you are some creep.’

We both ordered and sat down at the back of the shop in a little booth waiting for our name to be called. The seats were soft and easy to melt into, though the leather was significantly colder than the warm little shop. It was easy for my Lightning McQueen PJs to warm up the seat for me though. I fucking love these jammies god-damn.

“Nice PJs Jean.” Marco voice was dripping with sarcasm that could easily have been masked by the little smile that adorned his face.

“Hey there man, don’t you dare diss the McQueen, if you do that I will have to take them off and fucking strangle you with the fuzzy and warm legs parts.” I was fucking serious about these jammies, nobody fucks with me and the McQueen.

 He cheeks puffed out and a smile was placed in between but was hidden when a hand held back a loud laugh. His face was starting to turn red and his eyes were tearing up, his dark eyebrows were pushing up into his forehead creating more creases to squish the freckles together. I can hear the poor man let out a loud breath signaling that his near laugh attack was over.

“Mr. Lightning Mcqueen!” I shot a look at Marco that basically translated to, ‘I swear to god you turd.’

I got up with the entire shop watching me and my stupid (I mean wonderful) cartoon car fuzzy pants. Once my walk of shame was over, and I reached the counter with the barista handing me the a caramel frappe and a black coffee were handed over she pointed at Marco and whispered in my ear, “make sure to tell Mater I said hey.”

I glared at her and turned around and walked back to our little corner. I slammed down Marco’s sissy-ass drink and sulked into my side of the booth we were in and gave him the dirtiest look I could possibly muster.

“Fuck you Marco Bodt.”

“Hush up Mr. McQueen and drink your damn coffee.”

And I did just that. I drank that entire cup of steaming hot and bitter dark coffee with a fiery look of defiance, which after feeling my tongue and throat becoming raw came to the stunning the conclusion that coffee fucking burns like the touch of Satan himself.

Marco happily sipped his drink in front of me as I waited for my mouth to cool down enough to speak to him properly.

“Want to head back?” I could tell by the slurping noises coming from him that he has finished his pussy-ass drink.

“Yup, ready to blow this Popsicle stand, Mater?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be, McQueen.”

* * *

 

We stood outside of my dorm and fidgeted for a little bit, neither one of us wanting to say goodbye just yet. I fiddle with my fingers and the soft fur of my awesome fucking jammie pants.

I decided to be the first to open my mouth and say something. “I swear I know you, I don’t know how but you seem so familiar and I never get along with someone so quickly.”

I can see his fidgeting turn from something to busy himself with to be being more and more nervous the more I talked. “W-what do you mean Jean, we just met today.”

I shook my head and faced him and leaned in closely our faces were had little space between each other as I scanned his freckles that were placed on his slightly reddening cheeks.

“I know these freckles, I swear I do. I know what shapes they make. I know how they are haphazardly thrown on your face.” I paused and flicked my eyes up at his widened brown orbs. Where they once held a warmth and happiness they were now filled with a nervous and almost pain filled tint.

“Idon’twhatyouaretalkingaboutok.” His reply was rushed and barely comprehensible.

I shrugged and held out my fist to him. I was left hanging for an embarrassing amount of time because he seemed to be in a completely different world. I decided I waited long enough and picked up his fist which was resting on his side. He seemed to flinch and his face reddened further as I pressed my fingers to his making them curl into a fist and maneuvered it to meet mine.

“See ya around Freckles.” He snapped out of it and smiled at me saying, “Definitely Horseface.”


	2. He's Knows and I Don't, But Yet I Kind Of Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hate it when Jaeger shaves his legs and tries to unclog the drain with a wrench.
> 
> I hate it when he wears towels made for people half his size.
> 
> I hate it when he whines and bitches about everything.
> 
> But I don't hate having Marco's lips so close to mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I HAVE A BETA! They are so sweet and patient with me! Beta's are a huge help oh my goodness!
> 
> so this chapter should be significantly less sloppy than the last one!

After that really lame but almost sweet fist-bump and farewell, I rushed behind the dorm door and leaned  against it, feeling my heart beat fast and my face heat up intensely.

I didn’t want to feel this way towards another stranger to whom I’ve only known for two and a half hours, but honestly I’m not sure how to feel.

I wanted nothing more than to figure out who Marco is. I don’t think that this feeling of knowing the freckled bastard will go away anytime soon and it’s not like I have plans for break anyway. So a little investigating shouldn’t really hurt that much.

‘He’s hiding something from me.’ My mind wandered to this fairly obvious point. The way his eyes changed and how his face lit up was off-putting and only raised more questions to be answered. He probably knows me, or he feels the same way as I do and is confused by the air between us.

‘Or maybe you’re over thinking this?’ Shut up Brain, no one asked you. I went to bed with this still playing in my mind. I went through the day and fell asleep with this thought repeating itself as the day played like a film in my mind. This has been the happiest I’ve been in a long time, but I wondered why was it him that brought this out in me. I feel asleep fitful, but happily that night.

* * *

 

I was shocked out of my near paralyzed state when I heard a loud clunk noise and Eren yelling some obscenities in the bathroom. I hoped he hadn’t broken anything in the bathroom. I could care less if that little shit cracked his stupid noggin open. I would give more of a shit if he had torn out the shower head again.

Groaning and muttering my own string of curses, I strutted tiredly, and albeit clumsily over the bathroom wallowing in the rage I intended to expel onto my idiot roommate. Once I had reached the door and turned the cold door knob to open it, I would rather have preferred he’d ripped out the shower head again in favor of what I saw.

Sitting inside the tub, razor in one hand and a half shaven leg in the other, the brunette looked at me and gave a look that exuded ‘I did this on purpose but please don’t hurt me.’ I am so going to hurt him, though the damage to him depended on the damage to our shower.

 The words “What is it, Eren?” seeped out of my mouth with venom as he gulped and pointed to the drain. From what I could tell the metal gate protecting the inside of it was removed and surrounding it was small masses of Eren’s leg hair. But what really caught my attention was the fucking wrench that lodged inside the poor opening.

“It was clogged,” Eren squeaked out and raised his hands in defense of his statement.

“So you put a wrench in it?” I said in a somewhat calmer tone, but only because I had yet to process what the absolute fuck was going on.

“I was trying to get the hair out and-“

He didn’t have time to finish because I walked over crouched down to his level and looked him straight in the eyes and repeated myself, “So you put a wrench in it.”

His eyes stared back into mine with a wild amount of tenacity and defiance. 

“Yeah, I put a fucking wrench in this bitch, and you know Jean, this mother is stuck as fuck.”

 As if to prove his point, he yanked on the part of the metal instrument that protruded from the hole, and showed me it wouldn’t budge no matter how much he yanked at it.

 “Told you dude, anyway I’m going to shower at Armin’s dorm later,” Eren said waving dismissively and standing up, his barely big enough towel riding up showing places I never wanted to see from Eren.

Then that little bitch walked right past me pretty much dripping wet and naked and just walked straight out of the dorm. I could feel my ears begin to heat up from frustration and anger rather than the previous flustered feelings.

I couldn’t fucking believe this.

I continued to stare at the wrench that was lodged into my shower drain even after I heard the door slam shut. I stared at the metal object that seemed to mock my very existence, it taunted my very being it dung into the very recesses of my mind- wait what the hell. It’s just a stupid wrench anyways, well, a stupid wrench that would prevent my nightly shower.

I rolled up my hoodie sleeves and my jammie pants. It’s not going to get itself out of that drain now is it?

I sat in the tub and awkwardly made small adjustments to my position in order to get the upper hand on the damn thing. I braced my hand the handle that was jutting out and reared back pulling with all of my might. I grunted and panted and with every attempt I made to dislodge the damn wrench, the weaker I got the less patience I had. I could feel the fuse on my temper start to burn out and my head was filled with thoughts on how I was totally going to murder Eren Fuckface Jaeger.

I can feel my arms start to burn and shake and tears prickled in the corner of my eyes. I didn’t deserve this! I did nothing that was bad enough for me to start the afternoon crouched in Eren’s leg hair trying to free a fucking wrench from our shower drain.

I wanted to curl up into a ball and sob inside the tub but the abundance of gross leg hair prevented me from doing so.

I sighed, exasperated, and got out of the tub. I rolled down my pants and sleeves and exited that hell hole, its Eren’s mess to clean up now.

I was finally able to relax into the couch and settle in when a knock sounded at the door. I groaned loudly, pushing myself up purely with the force of anger and stomped towards the door. I threw it open and looked up to give the asshole at the door that ruined my moment of peace a rude look.

My mouth opened a bit and I furrowed my eyebrows when I looked up and was met by a familiar set of freckles.

“I heard screaming.” 

Of course he did.

 I grunted and rubbed my forehead with my thumb and pointer finger, massaging it. I closed my eyes and walked inside motioning for him to follow me in. He came in and awkwardly stood in the middle of the neat but somewhat cluttered living room area of the dorm. I collapsed onto the rough couch and relaxed and much as I could into its hard and uncomfortable surface. The fabric covering the main part of the couch was old and becoming more old and scratchy rather than the soft and warm it was in its golden years.

I let my head fall back onto the back ridge of the couch, what little hair I had from my undercut falling down. I sucked in deep breaths, telling myself to calm down for Marco’s presence. I rolled my head around to look up at the man standing in front of me rocking back and forth on the balls and heels of his shoes, whistling softly to a tune that was unknown to me.

I patted my lap with my hands and used their position on my legs as leverage to stand up and stretch. I walked over to the tiny kitchen and looked over my shoulder and motion towards the couch for him to sit down, though it looked more demanding than asking.

I opened up one of the few cabinets and pulled out a bag of Doritos, which were a part of Eren’s mom’s care package that she sends us every other month. It was usually a box filled with snacks and actual boxed meals that we could cook up one day or another, but those are usually things that we ate two of at each sitting.

I found Marco on the ratty couch sitting straight and tall, and tossed the opened bag in his lap and then fell back into the couch next to him. I could hear him happily helping himself to the chips, hearing the bag rustle next to me and smelling the sharp cheese smell, which honestly smelled like socks.

His munching was making a lot of noise. His eating habits closely resembled Erens as he shoved handful after handful of Doritos in to his mouth. He hardly waited for the first batch of chips to go down his throat before he shoved more into his mouth.

I could hear him crunching the chips and swallowing them and shoving more into his mouth. I spotted a few crumbs that stuck to his rosy pink lips and felt and immediate pang of jealousy. They teetered on the lips and with an open threat to jump, though I’m not sure why anyone would want to escape Marco’s lips.

As wonderful as Marco looked eating handfuls upon handfuls of chips into his mouth the awkward silence was starting to get to me and I wanted him to pay attention to me.

I nudged his arm once with my elbow. I was a little stunned by the unexpected firmness, and the indifferent grunting noise he made as he ate more. So I went ahead and decked him in the arm. My fist hurt slightly after hitting his muscle, but frustration took over and I continued to hit his arm until he noticed me.

What’s worse was that Marco didn’t even flinch, he just happily continued to munch on the chips again. I was paralyzed from the recent discovery and reached my hand out and squeezed his bicep and then mine. They weren’t that different, were they?

Marco noticed me groping his arm, and I retracted my hand with a blush staining my cheeks. ‘Damn it Jean, stop being such a weirdo,’ how about you stop being such a judgmental bastard, Brain.

I stuttered out the beginnings of an apology when he started to laugh loudly. His voice was like my favorite music on repeat, something that I have heard a thousand times, but I could never grow tired of. His loud outburst was ending and I could feel the disappointment of not being able to hear him laugh run through my veins and the first thing that I wanted to do was fix that. But, I was interrupted by small hiccups. They were tiny and barely noticeable hitches of the breath but every one of them made me focus whole heartedly on his face scrunching up trying to stop the little noises from coming out.

I can’t believe how adorable this man is, this is almost borderline upsetting.

“I bet it’s been a while since your last workout, huh Jean?” 

The wonder I was bathing in snapped away and was replaced with twinge of playful anger.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that you are, well, mushy-“he started out, but quickly realized his mistake and rushed to fix it with, “in a good way I swear! I mean you are practically a stick but you do have muscle it just doesn’t show as much, and, and…”

 He stopped there for breath but he never continued it. He just stared at me with me with wide brown eyes that begged for forgiveness.

I have my opportunity to swim in them, it was literally staring me right in the face. So I took it and ran. Not literally though. I have no plans in taking Marco’s eyes and running.

The more I stared into his chocolate eyes, the more I realized how warm and embracing they were. I wanted to spend the rest of the day studying the little flecks of darker brown and gold. They were so enticing and they made me feel strange and warm, but this warmth was not foreign to say the least. I felt as if I have stared into the never ending pools of brown for a thousand times. As if I have already memorized their complexing, soothing pattern.

I failed to notice that the talking man in front of me had ceased from explaining, and he stopped his ranting in its entirety. He was staring back now and his eyes softened and a whole new beautiful was introduced to me. I was close enough to feel his breath and to see his barely noticeable pupil adjust and dilate.

He raised his hands and placed one on my shoulder and the other rested lightly on my cheek, probably in an attempt to not scare me. But I nuzzled into his warm hand and continued to get lost in his stupid and beautiful eyes.

The more I go on about this, the cheesier it gets, but I’m starting not care anymore. I brought up my shaking hand to cover his hand, resting it lightly, willing it to calm down enough for it to stop all its shaking.

His breathing picked up and his eyes started to glaze over slightly. I wanted to see more him of like this. I wanted to relive him from the past.

Wait, what, from the past? As in this has happened before, also meaning that I have known him before. I have never met him before yesterday, but I could not shake the feeling of how he felt so old and familiar. I knew I have touched this face before. I knew that I have mapped out these freckles and the constellations of made up stars they made. But almost like, it was in a different lifetime, a different universe. Maybe even a different me.

I didn’t like this revelation, it scared me, and it made me feel like I was missing out on something, that this missing piece could’ve been with me for so much longer than just one day.

He pulled me a little closer, his lips ghosting over mine. They were soft and light and his breath was airy and minty and he whispered into them, “I know what you mean, that we have met before.”

My heart was beating so fast, it thumped painfully in my chest. I wanted him kiss me now. I never have wanted something so badly in my life. I wanted the teaser to his sweet embrace to end, I wanted to real show to start. I started to become nervous and wanting and he was taking too long with his half lidded eyes wandering my face.

“Dammit Marco, close your eyes and kiss me you asshole.”

I wasn’t expecting the courage to rise up so quickly and I almost regretted it until he smiled against my lips and closed his eyes.

His touch was feathery light and ended far too quickly when we jumped back suddenly to the sound of my roommate entering the dorm and slamming it shut. We awkwardly looked at each other with meek eyes and flushed faces.

I moved quickly to the other side of the couch completely avoiding eye contact with Marco, and responded to Eren when he grunted at me as he walked past us. I spared Marco a fleeting glance and saw that he started to nibble at the ends of the Doritos he fished out of the bag. Though soon enough he rolled the bag up and placed it on the makeshift coffee table.

He stood up and brushed off his pants while walking away giving me small and modest wave with a heavy flush settled on his freckles.

Marco shuffled hurriedly out of the door taking the warmth and comfort with him. I was back in my old mood but with a twinge of bliss still resting in my heart.

Groaning, I rolled over on the couch but shot back up when the door opened again and a freckled face peered through. He smiled nervously, offered his shower to me hurriedly, and scribbled down his cell and dorm room number on our dorm’s infamous whiteboard and took his leave.

As soon as I deemed it safe to, I jumped eagerly off the couch and snatched a sharpie off the floor, nearing toppling head over heel on the floor as I ripped open door again to jot down the information on my wrist. I then used the opposite wrist to wipe it off of the whiteboard so Eren wouldn’t tease me about it later.

Later that night, my heart fluttered and I nuzzled into the sheets of my bed. The light touches of Marcos lips not quite meeting mine had made my heart pitter-patter in my chest. It felt light but so heavy at the same time, and I could feel my stomach drop because the butterflies bursting from it.

I knew next to little about Marco Bodt, but I could’ve sworn that I’ve known him forever.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okie dokie nothing like extreme sexual tension and cock blocking rommies!
> 
> but hey the story had to have or two cliches! 
> 
> tumblr is chickenjaegers.tumblr.com so if you have questions its best to reach me there!
> 
> later taters!


	3. I know Him, But He Can Never Know Me Even in This Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every breath from him is something that keeps me going.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW!!!!!! I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN SOMETHING SO EXPLICIT (its not even that explicit k)
> 
> I also googled weird things people do when masturbating so nipple pinching popped and yolo right,yeah, "yolo"
> 
> i beta'd myself cuz im in a pinch

He lay curled up in a thick blanket on his small bed. The cold was prickling his skin like the touches of Jack Frost’s fingers that left him chilled and shivering under the large comforter. The night sky was dark but the bright moon left a startling contrast in the room in which the man laid.

  
He rolled over and thought about the past few days with Marco. Every memory he replayed involved Marco in some way or another; whether he was there to help him up when he tripped, when they bro-hugged before separating to their dorms (which were fairly close together). Even his toothy smile and never ending kindness had weeded into Jean and manifested a feeling of admiration and flustered emotions.  
His smile was the worst of them all; it shined bright and radiated a sweet soft kindness that Jean has never really experienced. And he would be lying if he said he wouldn’t mind if Marco smiled like that all of time. He smiles a lot already, but even more would be absolutely perfect. All he wanted to do was make the freckled wonder smile so he can see how long it would take to count his white teeth. He usually saved such bright smiles for Jean himself, and that made the man all warm and fuzzy inside. Cliché intended by the way.

  
He didn’t understand why he was falling for him so fast. He did the same for Mikasa but that didn’t roll over well and he vowed to never do the same for fear of rejection. But this time, he thought that maybe Marco would love him too. He wanted Marco to love him too.

  
Even though weeks have passed Jean could still feel the vibrations of breath lingering on his lips, the taste of mint and Doritos that tickled the skin of his mouth and teased his heart. Initially it would seem like a terrible combination to have but Marco seemed to be able to pull it off just right.

  
Being so close to him he could feel the softness of his warm green hoodie that had the word ‘SMILE’ imprinted on the front about a dozen times that he was always wearing.

  
He radiated the heat of many suns or thousands of heaters and his skin smelled clean, fresh, and a little like pretzels and cinnamon. It was enough to make Jean unravel and turn into mush.  
Marco was the epicenter of familiarity and the captor of Jeans heart. Even if Jean wanted to break free wasn’t sure if he could, or if he even wanted to. He held the key to his heart and it was locked up tight only in search for one man to set him free. That man was Marco and Jean was sure that he swallowed the key.

  
Jean was sent into a whirlwind of scrambling emotions trying to get their bearings. A hailstorm of Marco and his sweet perfectness was hailing down on jean and he was sure he almost didn’t mind. He remembered feeling this way sometime before, he could’ve sworn it. But not for Mikasa, this was so much different, so much more pure and sweet. It was soft and sensual, unlike when he liked Mikasa which was more skin-deep and lusting after a toned, beautiful woman.

  
He was drowning in this comforting embrace that was Marco’s essence and he wanted to drown further it, he wouldn’t care if he died there because he was sure that it would probably the most comfortable death one could possibly have.

  
Jean thought about this as his hand drifted from its place on the pillow to rest on his chest; his fingers spread and rubbed at one pec finding the nipple and rubbing it in small circles occasionally pinching it. He weeded out a small whine as he continued his own ministrations while he let his right hand to dance along his fiery skin and to wander further down fidgeting with the drawstrings on his pajama bottoms. He groaned as the tips of his fingers went under the fabric and teased the hipbones as the lingered close to his length.

  
The hand working at his chest left its position briefly to tug off the flannel bottoms with the help of the other hand that left its designated post to help out. Once the bottoms were off Jean thanked god that he slept commando under these.

  
The left of the twin appendages flew back to his chest and went back to work as his right thumb grazed the tip experimentally. The moan he released was loud and wanton and he had never been happier for the fact that Eren was out clubbing tonight.

 

He growled as he gripped his dick and dragged his hand up slowly savoring the feeling it brought him.

  
His mind began to wander and to be honest the imagines in his mind weren’t clean in the slightest. Levi would scurry to safe place to Windex the fuck out of the pictures that haunted his mind.  
He could feel Marco hovering over him his light breath ghosting over his neck, the puffs of air tickled and felt right on his neck. The hands on his dick and chest were swatted away by Marco and replaced with his own, but the touched changed from fast and rough to slow and calculating. They weren’t extremely gentle nor where they hard.

  
It felt so good but it kept him on the edge teetering him back and forth from climax.

  
Marco’s hands were soft and calloused, it was strange combination but Marco makes strange combos look good, and feel so fucking good too.  
‘That stupid idiot is too perfect.’ Jean could almost hear Marco giggling above him.

  
In fact Jean could almost feel the heat from Marco’s body; he was always so warm and soft.

  
His hand sped up as his fantasy Marco dissipated as his mind grew to foggy to imagine a Marco laying on him and jerking him off, maybe even fucking him straight through this mattress. As much as he wanted to dwell on that thought his mind was blank and his hands mover faster and harder, tugging, rubbing, and palming.

  
He noises turned from the occasional grunt to loud moans and mewls. Sweat dripped down his body and he was becoming sore. His lip was turning a heavy shade of red from being bitten for too long.  
With one last cry he came. His hand was wet and Marco’s name clung to his lips.

 

* * *

  
Marco knocked on Jean’s bedroom door and called for him in a sing song voice. He wanted to spend time with his good friend and to watch a shit load of scary movies for them to watch all day. He knew that Jean had little to no taste for the horror genre and was a closet rom-com addict, but Marco didn’t feel like indulging him today.

  
“Jean~ are you ok?” his voice started off playful but quickly grew with a worried undertone. He waited for a reply for a little longer and decided to let himself in. He opened the door and practically had to push his way in because of all of the shit Jean insisted on leaving on his floor.

  
“Jean, are you-“ he cut himself off and slapped a hand over his mouth and face the was growing hotter and redder the longer he stood there staring.

  
Jean was spread out over his comforter legs slightly spread and half naked, his manbits were covered by the oversized Megadeath shirt that Reiner had given to him a week back. Jean adjusted his position mumbling in his sleep revealing his goods in return the boy screamed and flailed trying to get out of Jeans room but fell over on his face instead tripping over some dirty clothes.

  
Jean awoke with a start and shot up into a sitting position on his bed, his legs in a sloppy criss-cross-apple sauce fashion. He looked startled as Marco struggled on the ground. He started to ask a question but Marco rolled face first into the ground and pointed in the vague direction of Jeans lap.

  
He looked down and started to scream too. Both grown men were in Jeans bedroom screaming. Taking turns in sharing their voices and sometimes harmonizing their shrieks.

  
After a while Jean finally found the decency to cover up by pulling down the hem of his shirt and holding a pillow down over his lap for extra protection while throwing the rest of the pillows at Marco and screaming “get out, get out, get out “until the bigger boy left.

  
Jean’s face felt as though it were set on fire. It burned with embarrassment and he felt little tears prickle at the corner of his eyes. He took the one remaining pillow and shoved his heated face into grumbling into the soft, plush surface.

  
Jean fell back onto the bed and rolled over lazily still covering himself up thinking that he got off some what easy considering if Eren had ended up being home and hearing all the commotion, he knew if he was he was sure to bust in and point at Jeans dick and laugh manically.

  
Picking up a plaid pair of PJ’s Jean walked out of the door and took a deep gasp of air when he saw Marco by his door face buried into his hands. Jean could tell he was still blushing because the tips or rather the entire ear was washed from tan to bright red. They were probably warm and soft to the touch too, but Jean would rather not think about that.

  
He sat down next to the freckled man and awkwardly stroked his back in a way that said; “hey man sorry about you seeing my dick.” The boy flinched under Jeans touch and squirmed a little. He noticed that the hard back was warm with every little stroke he made. The shirt he is wearing did little of a job to stop the warmth from seeping out. Jean’s hand stopped the soft touches and turned into harder rubs. He massages Marcos back for some time before he heard a little noise come from the man next to him.

  
Jeans rubbing ceased as he stared at the back of his neck, for he was hiding his face in his knees.

  
“Marco, come out.”

  
“No.”

  
Jean sighed as he moved his hand from his friends back completely, he sat on the balls of his feet and poked Marco’s strong arm. He used the hand not doing the poking to hold his knees to his chest to keep him balanced. One could retort that he looked like a little kid like that, but Jean had another thing entirely on his mind; like trying to get the freckled child to come out of his little cocoon.

  
After a solid minute of various kinds of poking in various areas of Marco’s arm the older man grew tired of Jeans prodding and looked up at the dork whose face was twisted in concentration. Marco smiled and put his hands on both sides of Jeans face. He smiled warmly as his legs stretched out from his fetal position and twisted his body slightly to the side, he whispered apologies into the thin space between his Jeans parted and surprised lips.

  
“Jean, will you let me?” Marco wanted to have consent for this action because being rejected with a kick or a fist hurts emotionally and physically, and the only thing physical Marco wanted from jean was something that was loving and sweet.

  
Jean nodded enthusiastically shut his eyes tightly creating little crinkles of his own in his eyes. Marco bridged the small gap and gently pressed his lips onto the lips in front of him. The kiss was gentle and barely there, but it was sweet and sent shivers rack their bodies.

  
The kiss soon became more heated and harder when Jean wrapped an arm around Marco’s neck and drove his other into his hair pulling his as close to him as he possibly could, mashing their lips together and making them release a small groan into the kiss. That noise made the other light a fire in the pit of their stomachs; sensuality has been replaced with rough sexual desires. The noise spurred them on to a competition to make the other repeat that little noise.

  
Marco pushed Jean down onto the ground and peeled the mans arms from his neck and pinned him by his forearms to the solid floors.

  
Jean squeaked and writhed around under Marco in an attempt to gain the upper hand. But Marco hasn’t having any of that. He nibbled on Jeans bottom lip hoping to draw out a small moan from the man. His hopes have been heard and Jean opened his mouth slightly groaning loudly. Marco took this as an invitation to invade and explore Jean’s mouth, kind of like the British when they landed on the new world.  
Marco mapped out Jeans mouth and did his best to memorize what would make him shiver and what made him writhe and groan. Jean was just as noisy as he always is, and Marco couldn’t say that he didn’t miss that about him.

  
The man on top pulled back and studied Jeans face, which was flushed to a ripe crimson and his golden cat-like eyes were half lidded and hazed over. His mouth was slightly parted and red from the kisses. He was strangely quiet and he swallowed thickly and struggled to sit up in Marcos arms. His grip loosened up considerably and he was able to sit him and Marco up so that Marco was sitting with his legs stretched out and Jean sitting in his lap.

  
Jean nuzzled into Marco’s neck and mumbled,”Sorry if you can feel my boner, man.”

  
“Yeah, I can feel your boner.”

  
“So, you like what you feel?” Jean gave a small wink and Marco laughed loudly.

  
“Considering you’re the one who has the boner, you must like it more than me.”

  
Jean broke himself away from the warmth and comfort that was Marcos neck and glared at him.

  
Marco giggled and tried to stand up but Jean clutched harder onto him, with every attempt ending with the limbs clinging tighter and tighter. Marco sighed and used the wall as leverage to stand both him and Jean up at once. The start was wobbly and resulted in Jean holding tighter nearly chocking the poor freckled man out. Once he got his bearings he placed his hands under Jeans ass and attempt to walk. It was shaky and hard to maneuver around but he made his way the kitchen and released his hands to search for food.

  
He assumed once he let go Jean would fall off or let go but nope, the man clung onto him with his legs and arms and seemed to be in an immovable state. Marco wondered at this as he shook his torso in an attempt to test his strength and determination.

  
‘I guess he hasn’t lost that much muscle tone since I left,’ Marco thought to himself contently. He used the advantage of having both of his arms and opened the small cabinets riffling around for some ramen or mac n’ cheese to make, maybe even some of those Doritos if worst came to worst.

  
The struggle is very real when he started to feel the consequences of a grown ass man clinging to his torso. It was hard to move around in the tiny space and it was starting to make his muscles burn but every attempt to shake the man was in vain as he clung tighter and tighter making disapproving groaning noises.

  
He found some ramen shoved in the back behind the Doritos and placed it on the counter. He held Jeans ass again to keep him level and he bent down to grab a pot from a cabinet below. He groaned loudly as he legs burned in rejection of the move. He grabbed the pot and slammed it onto the counter above his head. He then gripped the edge of the surface with an iron grasp and yanked himself up.  
Every limb burned and hurt, and he was about 2 seconds away from falling face first into the ground to body slam the clingy boy into the floor.

  
Marco weaseled his hands into the limited space between him and the other body and pushed as hard as he could. Jean whined and flailed around Marco’s hands.

  
“Marco, no, lemme be.”

  
“Jeannnnn, my legs and back hurt! You have to let go!” Marco countered jeans whine with another one. The whining continued from both sides until Marco had decided to just let this suffering end. He leaned forward a little bit, then he leaned back.

  
“Marco, stop that.”

  
“I’m afraid I can’t do that, Jean.” Marco leaned forward farther this time making Jean suck in an apprehensive breath. “Marco, no.”

  
Marco snickered evilly in Jeans ear. “Marco, yes”

  
He then threw himself forward making Jean scream loudly as they hurdled to the ground, the boy clutching for dear life watched his life flash before his eyes, which were shut tight, but he never felt the ground. He peeked out of one eye a spotted Marco with his arms stretched out keeping the two of them from hitting the floor. His arms are shaking and his eyes are shut in concentration and probably pain.  
Jean continued to hang there like a god damn sloth as he let go from the torso and fell the last few inches making a little ‘omf’ noise.

  
“That was more trouble than it was worth.” Marco grumbled as he set him self on down and rolled on his back so he was lying next to Jean.

  
They laid there shoulder to shoulder looking up into the dingy ceiling as if stars would appear and twinkle before them. The warmth between them was shared and appreciated since there was no heating and the frosty air leaked inside of their fortress.

  
Marco glanced over at Jean, his cat like eyes were closed and his sharp feature softened considerably. He traced the contours of his pale complexion with careful eyes. Marco could only wonder if Jean would ever remember him, the true him, not the Marco that was lying next to the resting boy, but the Marco that died on the battlefield in Trost, the Marco that faded from everyone else’s lives besides Jeans. Could the boy in front of him appreciate him like that again?

  
Would he even have to courage to tell the tale? To tell Jean about his death and all the complications it brought to him, how it changed him so much. How could he, how could he do that at all. There would be no point if he did so. Jean would probably call him crazy and ditch him right there. But it gnawed at him, an impossible hunger that needed relief that need satisfaction and encouraging words.

  
One day he will bring it up, and it would probably soon but there was no real need to ruin a moment like this so soon. With their bodies so close and souls even closer Marco has never felt so happy in all of his lives. It was now that love was realized and that nothing else right now truly mattered, besides Jean’s weird ability to cling to him like a fucking sloth.

  
Jean’s eyes burst open revealing golds and browns, he rolled over so that he was lying on his side and motioned shyly for Marco to do the same, as they balanced their weight together on the old flooring the scooted closer and closer to each other. Nothing felt like anything anymore as they collided into each other and buried their faces into each others necks. Marco basked in the breath that played at his neck, each puff sening a little shiver running down his spine with a warm flame trailing shortly behind. He could feel Jean shiver slightly in his arms, maybe it was for the same reason as Marco or it was because it was so frigid out.

  
“Holy shit, it’s like the fucking Arctic in this god damned dorm.”

  
Marco though so, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading i love all of you, have a great day/night!
> 
> tumblr: chickenjaegers.tumblr.com
> 
> later taters


End file.
